Five Odd Things That Regularly Cross My Mind.

1.) What to eat…what to eat…

Exactly.

Usually the first thing that crosses my mind when I wake up is something like, “What time is it?  8.  Okay, time to get up.  What am I going to eat?!??!!”  Yes, the first thing I think about when I wake up is FOOD!  In fact, I’m usually already thinking about it while I brush my teeth for bed the night before.  I’ll be brushing my teeth going, “Coffee? Yes, definitely coffee.  Cereal, maybe?  Oatmeal with bananas or oatmeal with apples and cinnamon?  Egg, perhaps?  Yeah, definitely eggs.  Eggs and coffee for sure tomorrow.”  I know it’s weird, but I’m not alone.  Recently, while turning down the covers before I bed I asked Matt, “Is it strange that right now I’m excited about what I’m going to eat tomorrow morning?”  He looked at me and said, “No, not all.  I always think about what I’m going to eat before I go to bed.”  So I asked, “Well, do you get excited about it, though?”  He considered it for a moment and then simply said, “Yeah.  I do.” C’mon, are we a match made in heaven or what?

2.)  Wait, how old am I again?

Just yesterday I was in a group of people who I thought were around my age, until the subject of age came up, and they all said they were between the ages of twenty-two and twenty-six.  I was like, “Yeah, I’m twenty-four…” and then a big mental whoop-lash came back around smacking into reality, letting me know that I am in fact twenty-nine not twenty-four.  My theory on age is that everyone has their own magic number that they never age passed.  Mine just happens to be twenty-four, but it can technically be anything depending on the person.  Does anyone else ever forget how old they are?

3.)  What will we name our first-born?

Yeah baby, don't worry, you'll get used to it...

So many options, so many options.  Usually this thought is sprung when the latest celebrity has a baby, and gives their child a completely ridiculous name…Apple anyone?  Blue?  <–Sorry Beyonce I heart you, but I don’t heart your first born’s name.  Anyway, it usually prompts me to start coming up with my own random/different names that in my fantasy world I would name our first born…you know the kinds of names that your husband would never go for?  Yeah, those kind.  The daydream always ends the same, with me settling on the names that Matt and I have already discussed fully (which I can’t disclose now), and me usually moving on to pet names instead…

4.)  WWJD (What Would Joan Rivers Do)?

Ever since I watched the Fashion Police episode when Joan blasted Christina Aguilera for wearing that completely wretched shirt she tried to pass off as a dress (awkward), and Joan said, “Looks like Lady Marmalade got into the peanut butter again,” her voice has been haunting me.

No comment.

I hear ya Joan. I hear ya.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I zip up my skinny jeans and I hear Joan in that thick New York accent say, “Oh Sarah, did you get into the peanut butta again?”  And I want to say, “Yes, Joan.  Yes, I did,” because the truth is, I have been getting into the peanut butter lately.  Guilty as charged!  But I listen to my inner Joan and sometimes change my outfit accordingly.

For those of you who have read my blog for some time, you know that I also often ask myself WWDD (What would Dolly Parton Do) for the angel on my right shoulder, and also WWLD (What Would Larry David Do) for the devil on my left shoulder.

5.)  Should I get bangs?  Like, real bangs?  Like bang, bangs?!?!

Kel, it's totally all your fault.


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Not to pass the buck here, but I fully blame Kelly Clarkson, and how cute her bangs looked at the Superbowl, for my latest hair mishap.  Yes, I am a hair stylist, yes, I said I was done cutting my own hair, but I lied.  Yes, I lied to each and every one of you and you believed me, but it wasn’t over.  I cut my hair again, giving myself Kelly Clarkson bangs, which were cute in theory, but after a day I hated them (naturally), and decided they didn’t flatter my face…which technically I already knew…because I’ve had bangs numerous times.  Okay, I’m done with that painfully long run-on sentence.  Let’s just say the voice in my head telling me to do it has now been silenced, and I’m resting easy…with bangs.  Oh well.

Enough about me, and more about you…What are the odd things that cross your mind?

~The End.

Photos by http://larryfire.wordpress.com/2009/05/09/the-most-popular-baby-names-of-2008/, HelloGiggles, myfashioncents.com

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